Sunday 29 December 2013

Just like the sea...



Rocks and Sea by Paul Gauguin 

This summer I was in Spain sitting on the beach, enjoying the warmth and the sun. That summer I met him properly for the first time. I’ve seen him many times before, but never realized how much we have in common. I’ve always seen him with my eyes, but this summer I saw him with my heart. I created a bond with him, and that bond will never disappear. That summer, and specifically on that day on that beach, I met the sea properly for the first time.

The waves were crashing against the shore, in a rhythmic motion, leaving a foamy white behind and going straight back to the source from where the came. They’d touch my feet sometimes, and I’d curl my toes in reaction to the cold water touching my skin.

In and out the waves went. I sat there for hours, in silence, and all I could hear was the sound of the crashing waves, so relaxing so soothing; a pattern that didn’t change: in and out and back again.

In that silence I heard another sound. The sound of my own breath, in and out my breath went, so relaxing so soothing; a pattern that didn’t change: in and out and back again.

I suddenly felt it, a bond with the sea. I felt like my breath was mirroring the motion of the waves, as if we were both doing the same thing; being alive. We were both there, and at that point I felt like the only difference between us was that we were different life forms; one of the same, but different forms.

I guess we tend to forget that about ourselves sometimes. We are a life form. Just like all that is around us. And many times we find ourselves defining who we are with what we own, what we’ve been through, the titles we carry, our religion, our nationality, and many things that are far from the truth of who or what we actually are.

This connection that I established with the sea this summer, is perhaps one of the most important in my life now. I find myself going back to it many times. When I am angry, I try to soothe myself by focusing on that inward and outward motion of the waves, I relive it when I focus on my breath in and out; and before I know it, I am there again, on that beach, relaxed and happy. When I feel powerless, I remember the power that the sea possesses, and I can then clearly see mine. This connection reminds me that I am part of the universe. I feel like I am linked to the sea, the sky, the trees, the animals, other humans, and life forms through the life we share. 

The sea illustrates lessons that no book can ever capture so eloquently. The sea teaches us to be alive, just as it is alive.  I love sitting on the beach, spending time with the sea, breathing together, it takes me out of my world and into a harmonious hymn. One that mutes all uproars, and noises.

The sea is a life form, its simple, powerful, relaxed, genuine, spontaneous, and alive. Underneath all that we try to hide ourselves with, we are a life form, we are simple, powerful, relaxed, genuine, spontaneous, and alive…

The artist of this painting, Paul Gauguin, was in search for utopia, and he believed it could be found in primitive forms. He abandoned his family and started searching for something simpler than the western society he was living in. He explored the ideas of connection with the natural world, liberation from cultural norms, and nurturing creativity. Whether he found utopia or not, is debatable, but I I know I get a glimpse of mine when I see this painting. 

Gauguin's painting 'Rocks and Sea' whispers, it whispers: we are all just like the sea.

Sunday 15 December 2013

Let go, let go when its time to do so ...

Refreshing Haven - Mikki Senkarik

"He doesn't treat me right." She said
"It's because you don't treat yourself right." I said

"He doesn't love me enough." She said
"Its because you don't love yourself enough." I said

"I don't understand." She said
"You will understand." I said

She has been standing in front of a locked door for way too long. Knocking but never getting an answer. She knocked one time, two times, a hundred times, a million, a trillion and with every knock she had hoped that this door would open this time around.

I recently read an article that started with Einstein's definition of insanity; he believed that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result each time.

So according to Einstein, she was insane. She knocked and knocked and just couldn't stop. It took all of her energy until she broke down. I found her lying on the floor outside that door. So I went up to her.

"What are you doing?" I said
"I'm waiting for someone to open the door." She said.

"But haven't you knocked enough, isn't it time you let it go? Look at what you have done to yourself, all this time you've wasted, this energy, you haven't taken good care of yourself. You haven't loved yourself enough." I said.

She got up, left the door behind and started to knock on the ones around it. Then she found a red one, that was wide open, right there waiting for her.

The next time I saw her, she was beautifully happy. In her 'Refreshing Haven'.
"I didn't even have to knock!" She said.
"Then you must be in the right place." I said.
"I understand now." She said.

She understands now. That some things in this life are for you, and some things aren't. You can't fight the balance of nature. She understands now, that once she loves herself, and takes care of herself, she'll land in the perfect place.

Once she made the decision to get up and leave that door behind. She started to feel better immediately. In retrospect, she realized that it wasn't the door she was meant to be knocking on.

I met her again, and this time she was  on the other side of  a red door. She had found her own personal haven, and I had found mine. Her insanity had turned into fulfillment, satisfaction, happiness, and so had mine.

"He treats me right." She said
"It's because you've treated yourself right." I said.

"He loves me." She said.
"Its because you have loved yourself the way you should." I said.

"I understand now. You walk away, when knocking starts to damage you. You walk away because you care enough about your soul. And because if whoever is behind the door isn't letting you in after all that knocking, then they definitely won't be worth waiting on a doorstep for." She said.

Whatever you encounter, give it your all. But know  that not every attempt will be a successful one, and have the strength to accept this fact. Then love yourself enough to let go, and move on when it is time to do so. Failure, is not an unsuccessful attempt, but rather the inability to acknowledge one, brush off the dust, and move on.

'Refreshing Haven' whispers, let go, let go when it's time to do so


Saturday 7 December 2013

A letter from my future self...


Two Heads of Nancy By Barbara Wells Sarudy
Dear Jude,

Happy Birthday. Today you turn 19. Still a young lady growing into all that you will become; with more of your life ahead than behind you.

In 40 or so years, you will be me.  Your body will be weak, your voice shaky, and your face covered with wrinkles, lots and lots of wrinkles. Make sure you don't try to fight this, don't go and be a customer of todays ever growing 'make me look younger' market; botox, surgery, and endless creams. Grow old with grace, and keep those beautiful lines on your face; each telling a story, each carrying an abundance of memories.

I want you to keep my words with you at all times. As you get older, remember to stay young at heart. Your heart is the most powerful tool you own. Fill it with love, and never let anger, hatred, jealousy, regret, or vengeance have room in it. EVER! Give love even when its not being given to you; for you give from what you are, whats inside of you,  not from what you receive.

When you're me, you will realize that there were people in your life who loved you more than anyone else, these are your family; your blood related family, and those whose souls have bonded with yours creating beautiful, awe inspiring friendships. Make sure they know how grateful you are and how much you love them. Spend as much time as you can with them, make them happy, make them proud.

Follow your passion. you are here for a reason and you will find happiness when you do what you were sent here to do. No matter what people will tell you, listen to your heart because unlike people, it knows you from the inside, from the core. When you do what you love, you will find joy, and peace of mind, and you will feel complete; these are things all the money in the world can't buy.

Don't search for the love of your life; it'll come to you once you do what you love. You'll cross paths with someone compassionate with a beautiful soul. And just like you, he will also be doing what he loves. You'll find each other. You'll deserve each other.

Don't ever underestimate what you're worth. Be very aware of how valuable and precious you are, and share your life only with a person who is equally aware of that.

Don't wait for someone to come along and complete you. Be whole; because you were born whole. let your own feet be your support, keep them firm, keep them steady on the ground. But let your soul wander around, explore, run wild, live everywhere, and see everything. Let yourself go down unfamiliar paths, even rocky, uneasy ones; because with your feet firmly on the ground you'll find your way back every time you get lost.

Make sure you leave a legacy for those who will come after you; touch the lives of those around you. Let the beauty of your fragrance linger on all those whom you encounter.

 Train your eyes to see only the beauty in everything, always look ahead and most importantly don't forget to look within. You create your own destiny, you have tremendous power within you and you activate it once you realize its existence.

You will go places, and you will do great things and then one day, and before you know it, you will be me.

When you're me, it is okay to look back, at the legendary story; called  your life. You will be proud, you will be happy and you will be satisfied. Knowing that you have lived it in the best way possible.

'Two Heads of Nancy' whispers a letter from my future self.

Sunday 1 December 2013

Happiness comes from within

Velvet Hand - Leif Podhajsky




Today is the first day of December. The most beautiful month of the year. You can just feel the festive spirit in the air. The Christmas decorations, people coming together, the lights, the music. It's wonderful. 

As the last day of December approaches, we get ready to celebrate. And before we know it, there it is; New Year's Eve. It's like a universal birthday, a fresh start for the world. There are parades in the streets, music, and families and friends celebrating everywhere. But when the night ends, no one goes home alone; everyone goes home with resolutions. Millions  of resolutions accompanying people from all over the world. And every resolution screams out a silent hope; that 'this year I will be happier.'

We all know how the story goes from there; 365 days later we realize we've only accomplished a quarter of these resolutions. But we tell ourselves its fine, the cycle goes on, and then there we are again, another New Year's Eve, another set of resolutions, and the lingering hope that again 'this year I will be happier.'

Although this hope transforms into a reality for many, it lingers much longer for a whole lot of others. Why? Because they look back at the year; a lost job, a bad break up, a divorce, losing someone close, and days just not turning out the way they were meant to. And the voice that says "Try again next year!"

From the 18 New Years, I have lived, the 8 or so that I remember, I learnt that being happy doesn't depend on how the year goes. Some of the happiest people I know have been through the toughest and most unpleasant of situations. But they made a choice, to accept whatever comes their way with grace. They made a choice to be happy. 

Being happy is not an outcome or a result. It's an attitude, you choose to face your life with. I once read that a situation never has any power over you, its the thoughts that you generate about that situation that have this power. Two people can pass through the same event, but it is the way they approach it, the way they choose to interpret it that will determine the effect of that event on them. 

I have learnt that things won't always go the way we want them to. Sometimes they will, and thats great, and worthy of appreciation. But other times they won't. Since we've been led to believe that being happy is a result of some utopian state, where we have all we want, in perfect blissful place, every year, when we look for happiness we search for something we do not understand. And its no surprise that we end up empty handed. 

In this artwork there are two hands. The outer hand, is the one doing the physical work. It's the hand that will end up with the dirt, the bruises, the scars. But then there's the inner hand untouched, and firm. Its the inner hand, that supports the outer one and gives it strength and determines the way it works. 

In this artwork there are two hands. The outer hand, is you living 365 days over and over. The inner hand is you making a choice to be happy, over and over, no matter what.

Your story, is your story. And in every story there is the good and the bad, the pleasant and the unpleasant, the smiles and the tears, the heartache and the solace, the easy and the hard. In every story there is also a hero, choosing to be happy, even when that choice might seem impossible.

'Velvet Hand' whispers, happiness comes from within.